August 08

Well here I am at the end of my 2 weeks holiday from work.
Thought it was about time I updated.
Over my 2 weeks off I have done next to nothing and its been absolutely great!

Yesterday I ordered a new sofa, and although its pretty sad i'm well excited. I've been living in my flat 3 and a half years and have never bought my own let alone a brand new sofa.
Here is my new sofa, it won't be cream it'll be "camel" which is a browny cream. Well happy.

Anyway update on the girls. Every year they go to a holiday club in the 2nd week of the summer holidays, its run by churches together in Hornchurch and I have to say its fab, anyway i digress. This year one of the new songs they learnt really stuck and Jess asked if they could get it on Cd I of course obliged and so they sang it all the more actions and all of course :@) That weekend Mark and I babysat and low and behold of course he has to endure/enjoy a performance of said song, but it was well worth it. Following the song Jess asked if we would read the bible with her :@) :@) :@) so we sat down and went over one of the passages they learnt at holiday club (about walking on water) and Jess had a real grasp of it and completely understood it and had remembered it perfectly. I then asked Jess if she knew what the words of the song meant, she had a vague grasp and Mark and I filled in the blanks and associated it with a paasage in the bible as well as an illustration using a candle that sits on the table everyday.

The words of the song are;

Shine, from the inside out, That the world will see you live in me,

You know me, and you love me, you fill me, so send me.

Shine from the inside out, so that the world will see you live in me

Know me, love me, fill me, send me.

I think the song is awesome, so simple yet profound and gave us a great talking point. I was grinning from ear to ear for the rest of the evening. God really gave us a fantastic opportunity and we used it to the best of our ability. Not only was I able to share that amazing opportunity of sharing the bible and God with Jess mark and I did it together and it was a great experience.

Later that week completely out of the blue, jess once again asked if i'd read the bible with her. We must have sat there for over an hour reading and chatting and sharing I was in complete awe of the opportunity God had given not once but twice in one week.

More update to follow at a later date........

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Just completed the spiritual gifts questionnaire (last one I did was 3 years ago)
Sitting thinking and evaluating in my head, just wanted to get down my thoughts.

In a period of limbo.
Of waiting.
Of sitting and waiting God's time.
Learning in a period of rest and stillness.
Not able to DO.
Just having to BE.


Could say a lot about the situation at the Corps, but i'm not going to.

Just the above thoughts.

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Encouragement and Opportunites Update 1 WOW!

Well what a week! I've been so encouraged and thankful for the opportunities that have been put in front of me.

Following my blog last week Jessie's bible arrived the next day and I gave it to her. She wanted to start from the beginning, so we went out in the sunshine last Wednesday afternoon and I sat with Jessie reading her bible - WOW!

She read the first 7 Chapters of the bible in her first sitting. She stopped occasionally and passed the occasional comment like "I understand that now" or "that makes a bit more sense now" I was just beaming from ear to ear and thanking God for the inquisitive little lady I had the priviledge of introducing to the bible and to God - WOW!

There was one question she asked (I think it was about the intricasies of Cain and Abel, and I was just honest with her and said to be honest Jess I don't know the answer to that, but I can find out if you'd like.

When Jess and I went inside I had the chance to have a chat with Becky who asked if she could have a bible like Jess's. So Ipromptly ordered her one and got it delivered to her house as I would be awasy at the weekend. I went to work yesterday and it had arrived and she'd read about creation and Noah already and then went on to read up to genesis 7 yesterday. Wow!

I had a brief chat with Julie (their mum) and said I hoped it was alright that i'd bought Jess a bible and explained the conversation i'd had with Jess. She then went on to tell me that Jess had also asked mummy and daddy if she could have a bible and they were going to get her one, so she thanked me for getting one for her! Thank you God for willing parents.

I really do feel honoured, excited and nervous about this new doorway God is presenting to me. I spend 4 days a week with these girls and love them to pieces and am really excited about them genuinely wanting to know and find out more. It's all coming from them and i'm taking it slowly - baby steps, prompted by them and where this may lead I am not sure, I am just so happy and pleased that we're going down this road at all. I'm trusting God step by step after all tiny mustard seeds and all that!

Please continue to pray for me and Becky and Jessie and their mum and dad and I'll keep you updated :@)

Encouragement and Opportunites

Whilst I could blog about roots, i'm still processing all that stuff but the current thing occupying my thoughts is to do with a conversation last week.
I was taking the girls (Jessie age 8, Becky age 11) out bowling last Thursday as it was polling day and as they climbed into the back of my car noticed my bible on the back seat, they've seen it a fair few times before and so didn't think anything of it - or so I thought. Until we'd got a little way down the road and Jessie asked me "Do you have to have to take a bible to church" I replied no you don't and whilst thinking about what I was going to say next Jessie chirps in with "you just like to take it" so I said yes I did. Now the girls know I go to church every Sunday and also go to 1 or 2 church related things during the week. So little conversations about choir practice, band practice and bible study occasionally crop up. But this was a new one on me and I was and still am challenged and encouraged by what Jess said next. She told me she didn't have a bible which I queried so she explained that she did have one but it was a small one that she got at her Christening. (Becky then chirped in that she only got ornaments at her Christening - which is a whole other blog altogether) Jessie said that she could read the bible she had because the writing was so small. Then she went on to say that she'd really like a bible so she could read some of it and read about Jesus.
Well, there's a whole load of directions I could have taken the conversation. Knowing the girls as I do I kept it simple and relaxed and simply asked if she would like me to buy her a bible. She said yes please i'd like that. So having thought about which one to buy her I have now ordered Jessie a bible. I am now praying that God will give me the right words in conversations with the girls and the right approach for this situation. I want to be a positive encouragemnt to the girls without coming across to the parents as trying to "convert" the girls. Both parents attended church when they were younger and the girls go to church for church parade, so I'm sure it won't but I am wanting to tread carefully, yet effectively.
So I had what you could call a WOW moment last Thursday, and am looking forward to seeing where God wants to take this. Please pray for me and Becky, Jessie and their parents as it seems God has opened a doorway for me and I thank him for that.

Where I'm at.

Have just been preparing the material for small groups this week and wanted to note down a few things I have drawn from it.
So although these verses may not make sense to anyone else reading them. Wanted to share them and also get them down somewhere I could easily refer to them.

Selected verses from Matthew 5, 6 and 7.

God blesses those who hunger and thirst for justice, for they will be satisfied.

Pray for those who persecute you. In that way you will be acting as a true child of God
By loving and praying for our enemies we can overcome evil with good.

Watch out, don’t do your good deeds publicly to be admired by others. Give your gifts in private, and your father, who sees everything will reward you.
Do things because they are right and you mean and believe in them, God knows your heart and will reward actions that come from your heart.

Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for.
Keep on seeking and you will find.
Keep on knocking and the door will be opened to you.

Please pray for me that I'll not just be able to tolerate those who are "enemies" but that I will be able to love them and treat them in the way I would wish to be treated and not in the way they are treating me.

Sorry heavy blog but just "where i'm at" as the title says.
I'm generally happy, just would appreciate your prayers for this one area.
Love to all who read this -x-

New Year, New Experiences?

Well yes and no.
The start of 2008 has been how shall I say hmmm INTERESTING.

Well I entered 2008 in a new relationship, which of course is a good thing - at least for me. However to some people it is a controversial relationship for many different reasons.

I realise people will and do have some concerns and issues with the situation and if you are one of them reading this then please feel free to talk to me about it and we can chat it over. I'd much rather that than have people stew on it, or worse still react in a negative way about it. I don't bite.

So the start of 2008 has had its ups and downs. Its been very much a mixed bag both experiences and emotions and also reactions.

The good thing to come out of this (other than my relationship with Mark, who I click with more than anybody i've ever come into contact with before) is that due to some peoples behaviour its pushed me even closer in my relationship with God, both as me but also as part of a couple. I've never had the experience of praying with my other half before and yes it was strange at first but its a great thing and can only help to bring as closer as a couple as time goes on.
The thing that is strange yet comforting is that however people react good or bad when they find out whatever happens this just feels right. Its hard to explain but it just does, with all the issues that go with it it just feels right and with all the turbulance going on around me at times inside i feel at peace. God's pretty amazing sometimes. I've always said God has a sense of humour and I believe that now more than ever. I just know God must have something pretty amazing planned and is using this situation to mould, train and equip us for whatever lies ahead. Which in itself is pretty scary. But my life is in his hands and thats where its staying so hey lets see what happens next.